Q1. I would like to try winter camping, where should I go first?
A1. Florida.

Q2. Should I encourage my son to try winter mountaineering?
A2. No.

Q3. What equipment and arrangements do I need to get started?
A3. A minivan, a six pack and hotel reservations

Q4. What's the first thing I should do to go winter hiking?
A4. Stay home.

Q5. What do you eat out there?
A5. Food bars and stuff.

Q6. How come all your photo work sucks?
A6. You try it, Ansel!

Q7. What should I do to train for winter mountain camping?
A7. Practice shivering.

Q8. What is the most important equipment for winter hiking?
A8. A life insurance policy.

Q9. Any book recomendations for the new winter hiker?
A9. First Aid manual.

Q10. Can you suggest any other good places to hike?
A10. In the woods.

Q11. Couldn't you afford real writers?
A11. No.

Q12. You guys aren't being very helpful here, why is that?
A12. Lawyers.